Pride and Arrogance

I recently heard Glenn Beck ask a group of soldiers what is the difference between pride and arrogance. I went to my Bible, Noah Webster 1828, Merriam-Webster online dictionary and Strong's Concordance to see if Glenn's comparison held up in a study of the above books.

First, I want to illuminate a fact about Bible study.

We use the KJV 1611 for many reasons. It is not my desire to go over those at this time. But I will state emphatically that I am a KJV man. I don't use, study, or refer to other versions. I have evaluated several of them, just for confirmation of their errors.

But we must realize that the KJV uses an English language that has changed a little. This is not the fault of the KJV. It is society's error. Many books written on the subject point out how much better 17th century English was.

I will give two examples of changed words:

1 Thessalonians 4:15  For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep.

Websters defines prevent as:

transitive verb

1 archaic

a : to be in readiness for (as an occasion)

b : to meet or satisfy in advance

c : to act ahead of

d : to go or arrive before

2  : to deprive of power or hope of acting or succeeding

3  : to keep from happening or existing prevent war>

4

: to hold or keep back : hinder, stop 

Most people don't even know the "archaic" definition. That was the definition in 1611.

Noah Webster's 1828 dictionary defines it as "To go before; to precede." That is the definition that matches the Greek word used in the original text.

Not knowing the proper definition changes the whole verse.

2 Thessalonians 2:7  For the mystery of iniquity doth already work: only he who now letteth will let, until he be taken out of the way.

Noah Webster 1828 says Let- "5. To retard; to hinder; to impede; to interpose obstructions."

Notice it is definition #5, but correctly matches the Greek in the verse and is true to the context of the passage. This verse better illustrates the changing of words, because Webster adds that this usage is nearly obsolete, only 200 years after the translating of the KJV.

Today we know this word to mean allow, but in 1611, it also meant to disallow or restrain.

There are others:

1.     advertise means tell (kinda obvious, but a little different)

2.     allege means prove  

3.     conversation means behavior or life 

And there are many more.

These in NO WAY take away from the authority of the King James Bible. It is OUR fault that our language has been degraded. Our college grads have nowhere near the vocabulary of young teens from even 200 years ago in our own country, much less when compared to someone from 17th Century England.

So, what of pride?

Webster's 1828 defines pride as:  Inordinate self-esteem; an unreasonable conceit of one's own superiority in talents, beauty, wealth, accomplishments, rank or elevation in office, which manifests itself in lofty airs, distance, reserve, and often in contempt of others.

It's first usage in the KJV is in Leviticus 26:19. It's meaning in the original text is "from 1342; the same as 1346:--arrogancy, excellency(-lent), majesty, pomp, pride, 

proud, swelling."

In subsequent usage, one word dominates the Strong's definitions of the original tongues: arrogance.

The modern webster dictionary defines pride as such:

1   : the quality or state of being proud: as

a : inordinate self-esteem : conceit

b : a reasonable or justifiable     self-respect

c : delight or elation arising from some act, possession, or relationship  (parental pride) 

2   : proud or disdainful behavior or treatment : disdain

3   a : ostentatious display

     b : highest pitch : prime

4   : a source of pride : the best in a group or class

5   : a company of lions

6   : a showy or impressive group

Similar to "prevent," pride has more meanings today than in 1828/1611. However, neither meaning is considered archaic.

Notice the two meanings I underlined and made bold.

When God says "Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall." (Proverbs 16:18) is he saying " a reasonable or justifiable self-respect" brings destruction? What is a "reasonable or justifiable self-respect?" This is what is meant when someone is declared to "take pride" in themselves, usually in their manner of grooming. An unshaven, filthy man who appears that way daily, regardless of whether he just worked, is said to take no pride in himself. So is God saying that having enough pride in one's self to shower daily will lead to destruction? I don't think so. That type of pride is reasonable and justifiable, and should be encouraged. 
It's similar to the carpenter telling his apprentice to take pride in his work. He's not saying "be lifted up and conceited" about your work. He's saying do a good job, have a little pride.

Let's look at the original text to see what God was referring to. The word translated as pride is:

ga'own gaw-ohn'

from 1342; the same as 1346:--arrogancy, excellency(-lent), majesty, pomp, pride,

proud, swelling.

This greek word appears twice in the KJV, not as "pride" but as "arrogancy."

While the modern word "pride" has both good and bad connotations, arrogance has only BAD connotations.

arrogance: an attitude of superiority manifested in an overbearing manner or in presumptuous claims or assumptions

Remember the lesson taught about the letter and spirit of the law in Matthew chapter five. Jesus kept giving the letter, but expanding it to the spirit of the law. So don't take the modern meaning as necessarily what God is saying. Which also means don't apply what God clearly means to all modern definitions.

The words God uses for pride are all of a bad connotation. But our English word "pride" has good connotations, as well as bad. 

If I say I am proud of my accomplishments, I am merely saying I am elated at the outcome. My testimony should already speak to others that I am grateful to God, but it also helps to add that. 

But which is more important: showing my thankfulness to God, or to man?

God knows my heart. He knows that I humbly acknowledge him as the source of all good in my life. Were he capable of forgetting it, I remind him daily.

I couldn't care less if someone is offended by me saying I have pride in my children. God knows that when I say that, I am not vaunting myself, or being arrogant. I am boasting, or glorying, in my child's accomplishments. 

If another Christian deems me to be arrogant for bragging on someone else, he is not only ignorant of the definition of pride, but is judging me with unrighteous judgment. that creates a problem between he and God, not me.

Every condemnation of pride in God's Word is interchangeable with the word arrogance. When God speaks against pride, he is speaking against arrogance, or hautiness. He is not speaking against every future meaning of the word pride. 

Why would God condemn a family of lions? That may sound silly, but so does applying God's condemnation of arrogancy to every modern usage of the word pride.

Take the following statement: I am proud of our nation and grateful to God that i was born in the USA.

Is that a contradiction? Pride and humility in the same sentence?

No contradiction exists. God is against arrogance, not pride in others. The true opposite of humility is arrogance, nor pride. Only some definitions of pride contradict humility, not every meaning.

I love my Noah Webster 1828, but it must be compared to newer dictionaries so we do not condemn practices which are pure, but use newer definitions.


Here is the absolute simplest illustration of meanings of words changing: In 1611, if a man built a wagon with all the latest gadgets installed, and his friend exclaimed, "That's bad!" upon first sight of the wagon, the builder would know he did something wrong. But in 1975 if another man made his Gran Torino look like the Starsky and Hutch car, and his friend exclaimed, "That's bad!" upon first sight of the car, the builder would know he did something right. Simple? Yes. Silly? Not really.
If we ran these two men together, and the 1975 man told the 1611 man that the wagon looked "groovy," the 1611 man would think he needed to sand the wood some more.
That is no different than a 2010 man thinking that every time his contemporary uses the word pride, he must be meaning arrogance, as the Bible does.


When I say "prevent" you can be assured that I mean "to stop" not to "go before." The exception is if I am quoting or describing I Thessalonians 4.

Glenn, or one of the soldiers, illustrated the difference between pride and arrogance in the following way: "Arrogance is pride without humility." I concur.

Ryan and Jessica's Wedding

Many know that last year my son, Ryan moved out on his own. Some know the circumstances, but I will not rehash the details.

He is getting married to Jessica King today. They met earlier this year.

Everyone will have their own opinion on this marriage. I have mine, as well.

Although he acts childish, and foolish, at times, Ryan is an adult, and is responsible for his own decision. He is fully aware that my desire is to see him get right, and return to his own God-directed goal of being a missionary. But that is between him and God.

Jessica is a great girl, and Tammy and I both like her. I think she will be a fine wife.

Regardless of what anyone thinks, now, after the "I Do's" this marriage becomes God's will for both of them.

It will be my honor to help them both make it a successful union.

I will not be there, but it's not in protest. We only learned of this about 11 days ago. I just spent a week at home for two days bereavement pay. I literally cannot afford anymore time off.

Some will still criticize me for that. To them I say, I must've missed the check you sent me to help pay my bills.

I wish Ryan and Jessica many happy years together. And of course, once they get on their feet, I expect some grandbabies to spoil.

New Things

Colossians 2:18  Let no man beguile you of your reward in a voluntary humility and worshipping of angels, intruding into those things which he hath not seen, vainly puffed up by his fleshly mind,


Paul is mainly dealing with Judaizers, here. But remember that the Bible is true on everything on which it speaks, so what Paul uses as red flags, or characteristics of Judaizers applies to other false teachers, and false teachings.

The word voluntary is applied to more than just the word humility. It simply implies that the false teacher is willingly doing what it is he's doing.

The angel worship was only to show their "false" humility. They pretended to believe that God was too great to be approached by man, so angels were used as mediators. Some, today, actually believe this, and write songs about it. Yet we know we can approach God boldly.

Hebrews 4:16  Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.

Jacob's ladder was divine imagery God used to show Jacob that "prayers go up, blessings come down." I don't need to pray to an angel, or dead saint, to have God hear my prayers.

It's not a matter of pride to boldly approach the throne of grace, it's a simple right as a joint-heir with Christ.

The humility is shown to be false in the last phrase. They were proud of their teaching, and were smart enough to know that a false humility would help to acquire favor in the eyes of the new believers. I'm sure David Koresh had a very humble spirit as he deceived the people in Waco.

Paul warns about those who speak of things they know nothing of. "Let no man despise thy youth" is not a license to disregard the advice of those who have "been in the fight" a little longer than you. Some secular colleges will teach you that the new graduate is better in his field than the old hand, due to the knowledge being fresh and updated. That's not always true, even in the secular world. The old hand has seen action in the real world, and often has a better approach to a solution.

But in the realm of Christianity, there are no updates. Often a new graduate has spent the last few years obtaining knowledge, and is wanting more. He feels the need to impress someone with his ability to "interpret" scripture. He begins to read and learn from those that his previous teachers would disapprove of in order to find this "new thing" he wants to share.

Paul tried this in Acts 17. It didn't work too well for him. That's why you don't find Paul ever writing to a Church in Athens. I believe it was a learning experience. He did get some to believe. God's Word never returns void, but he never tried that approach again.

God made the gospel simple so that anyone could be saved, with or without the presence of college grad. But training is required for those who desire to preach the whole counsel of God, or work in a particular field of ministry.

The challenge for the learned is to understand that all they have learned comes from the Bible. Study aids are great, but everyone has a Bible.

I can try and use something I learned in Bible college to persuade someone of my belief on an issue, but as long as he has a Bible, I stand the chance to be embarrassed by his knowledge of God's Word. Especially if he actually reads his Bible more than I do. And unless you read it 24/7, there's always someone who might read it more. That is why my preface to this blog, and past emails, has always said that I make no claim of higher knowledge.

The best place to learn about God's Word is in a pew of a Bible-believing church, every time the Church doors are open. The Pastor, and those he brings in, are your best professors.

 So, if you are getting your thrice weekly lessons, and studying your Bible at home, you won't be so apt to fall for "new things."

Forgiveness

Why do we whine when criticized by our boss, then call in a complaint on the pizza delivery guy because he accidentally mashed the lid into our pizza?
Do we ever stop to think of the consequences it might cost him?
When I delivered for Steakout, I might have looked like a college age kid in a Jeep, but I had a wife and two kids to feed. The pizza guy might be in the same position.
Would you make that complaint if you knew he'd lose his job?
It reminds me of the parable beginning in Matthew 18:21 when Peter asks about forgiveness.
The servant is forgiven of a great debt to his lord, then went to his own debtor and demanded payment. When the debtor couldn't pay the very small debt, he cast him in prison.
When his lord heard what he did, he castigated him then sent him to be tortured.
Would we risk the pizza guy's job if it put ours in jeopardy as well?
I'm not saying we should be pansies, and let people walk on us. There are things that we cannot allow to happen.
But so often we deliver our own brand of justice with no consideration for what it brings on someone who just made a mistake.
We hold back tips, call in complaints, leave bad comment cards, go on the internet and post nasty comments, and the list goes on.
Why not simply turn the other cheek?
We often think of being slapped when we hear that, but it applies elsewhere, too.
So the waitress is a little crabby and let your cup get empty. Try this: leave her a huge tip and a note saying we all have those days and you hope this helps hers get better. Her next table might owe you a great debt.
I don't believe in karma, but God does say we reap what we sow.
What will you sow today?
Justice? or Mercy?

I am thankful that God chose mercy in my life. You see, I cost him the life of his Son.
Justice would be an eternity in hell (yes, it's real).
Mercy would be forgiveness.
But God went a step farther and showed me Grace.

Grace was sending his own begotten son to Calvary to die for MY sin, and yours.

Grace brought death to Christ and sent him to the grave.

Then Grace ressurected the Saviour of mankind, giving me, and you, promise of the same ressurection if we simply believe in what you just read.

Grace makes me a joint-heir with Christ. That means I share all with the one who died due to MY sins.
That's Grace.

God gave all he had just to show me forgiveness. I only wish I would show it more often.

Family News

Tammy's Father passed away on 9/28.

He was a veteran of both WWII and Korea. He spent his life working for the railroad.

He was absent from nearly all of her childhood due mostly to his own wanderings. She was able to get in touch with him in 1998. We've been able to visit him several times since then.
Tammy led him to the Lord in 2000.

There are many half-siblings who have never met Tammy. Some might not want to because her mother was "the other woman" in their eyes. This may be Tammy's only chance to meet them.

He has already been cremated, and the memorial service is on 10/28 in northern Missouri.

Please pray that doors be opened for Tammy to start a dialogue with here siblings and possibly witness to them.

Also pray for our finances. We weren't ready for Christmas, much less for this emergency.
The easiest thing to pray for on the finances is that the next few weeks at work be above and beyond the average weeks.
We have a gas card with Shell, so we can pay off the gas later, but with no other credit cards, we will have three days of fast food, and two nights in a motel to pay for out of pocket.
So please pray that work picks up.

God is faithful. He got Tammy back in touch with her father so she could lead him to the Lord. I know he'll work through this, too.

How to Win Friends and Influence People, Biblically

Galatians 6:10 As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

I might have written on this topic before, but I was thinking about it again recently.

Dale Carnegie listed these six ways to making friends:

Six Ways to Make People Like You

1. Become genuinely interested in other people.

2. Smile.

3. Remember that a man's Name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.

5. Talk in the terms of the other man's interest.

6. Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.

God's version is not all that different. I know nothing about Mr Carnegie, so it isn't too much of a stretch to wonder if he was well acquainted with Galatians chapter six.

Galatians 6:1 Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted.

2 Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.

3 For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he deceiveth himself.

4 But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another.

5 For every man shall bear his own burden.

6 Let him that is taught in the word communicate unto him that teacheth in all good things.

7 Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.

8 For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.

9 And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.

10 As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

I'm gonna allow you to make most of the comparisons. I just want to dwell on the scripture.

This passage contains too many good nuggets for an easy summary, but it's basically the "Golden Rule" expounded. As many have said, we are not an island to ourselves. Everything we do touches somebody.

I used to always be the one who had to "one-up" every story I heard. I have always lived a very simple life and when I heard the exciting stories others told, I felt I had to make my life just as interesting. I thought that by making my life sound interesting I could gain their respect and friendship. Looking back, I wonder how many friends I drove away due to my stories that were sometimes out-right lies. I had also picked up a good bit of sarcasm while I was in the Army. We always made jokes about each other.

People like using verses 7-9, but often never mention verse 10. NEVER miss a "therefore" in your Bible reading. Whenever you see a therefore or wherefore, even at the beginning of a chapter, see what it is tying together.

Why are we to do good unto all men? Because of what verses 7-9 say. I am not excluding these verses from other applications. I just think it would be sad to miss the direct usage. Dale Carnegie was onto something.

During the first week at a new job years ago a few coworkers mentioned how I resembled a former coworker of theirs. Then they began to talk about why they didn't like that person. They used the word "abrasive" to describe his sarcasm and talked about how much he liked to talk about himself. Turns out he didn't just "look" like me, he acted like me.

I learned quickly to keep my mouth shut and saw the fruits immediately. Not only did my coworkers like me, but management saw it, too. I was recommended by my foreman to be a foreman in another department ahead of a lot of people. I didn't get the position, but the recommendation taught me a lesson.

If I treated others as I wanted to be treated, they returned the favor.

Luke 6:31 And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.

As my Pastor has said many times. The Bible is absolutely right on every subject it discusses. Even about human personal relations.

So what about the person who seems to not be playing by the rules? You know the one. You go out of your way to be nice to them and they are still just plain crabby. Well, first off, you should still obey Jesus. I don't see him qualifying his command by adding "only if they are nice back."

You have to go back to Galatians 6:7-9. We often use verse nine when talking about disciplining our children, and that is fine. But again, use it in context, also.

I've not perfected Mr. Carnegie's or God's plan. But using what humility I can muster has been very successful. I have found that I learn a lot listening to people. At first I may feign interest for their sake, but then I actually do become interested. I have also learned that after spending a while talking about themselves, others usually show interest in my life as well.

On a side note- I have discovered that my lack of an exciting life makes them feel even more special when they see how interested I am to hear about their more eventful lives.

I know nothing bad about Dale Carnegie other than what I had read on wikipedia. He did seem to know what he was talking about.

Look for opportunities to help others. Sometimes it is monetary, often it is not. It can be as simple as asking them how they are doing, and then stopping to listen.

Sin should be judged, but often we criticize others for not being mirror images of ourselves.

Sarcasm has its place, but use it carefully.

Remember that Jesus says that what we do to the least among us, we do unto Him.

Galatians 6:10 As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men, especially unto them who are of the household of faith.

Now for a list of things I need... Just kidding!

Getting Old

Psalms 71:18 Now also when I am old and grayheaded, O God, forsake me not; until I have shewed thy strength unto this generation, and thy power to every one that is to come.

My oldest Daughter turns eighteen today.

Alisha Marie Hopper 1999

I look at old pictures and wonder where the years went. I also wonder if I've given her the skills she will need to survive outside the doors of my house. Not just the regular things, like cleaning, cooking, raising children. But how will she follow God?

My prayer is to continue training her until I give her hand in marriage, and she becomes one with the man God has chosen for her.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

We can debate all day on the exact application of the last statement, but I see the first statement as a command.

She still has a few years left in high school. I will never regret the year we had to hold her back. It not only allowed her to catch up in school, but it adds years for us with her at home.

We already pray for her future mate to be a Godly young man, and for God to lead him to Alisha in God's time.

She will always be my little Cookie. I gave her the name the first time I saw her devouring cookie after cookie. At first I called her Cookie Monster, but later shortened it to Cookie.

Metropolis, IL 2010

9/11 and my Mawmaw

Yes, I realize a blog about 9/11 is a little past due. Sue me.

9/11 was a little different for me this year. It was my grandmother's birthday, and the first one since her passing last year, two days before Christmas.

My mother mentioned how hard it is going through a year of "firsts." First Christmas without her, followed by the funeral a few days later. First Mother's Day. First birthday.

We know the next big day will be the anniversary of her passing. I will try to be there for my mother, but I don't know what to say. I barely cried at the funeral, even though my aunts and cousins were sobbing near me, or on me. I hope none of them thought I was just being callous.

You see, my Mawmaw's life said, "Saved, saved, saved!" when I dropped out of church at age 17, she lovingly shamed me for refusing to go to church with my Dad.

When her Alzheimer's got worse, I kept praying that in her mind, somewhere, she was dreaming of walking Heaven's shore with my Pawpaw. I kept hoping that behind that empty smile, she was holding hands with her Saviour, and he was saying, "I'll always be here for you, Vernell."

Last time I saw Mamaw, 7/11/09

I know that's what she's doing now. I knew that at the funeral, while everybody else was crying. I knew she was looking down begging us not to be sad.

I don't think ill of those who were sad. As strong as we try to be, we are still human. I could have opened the floodgates of tears at any moment. I'm a crier. I'm not ashamed of that. Get me talking about what God did for me, and I tear up just thinking of His Grace. I cry often thinking how I miss my daddy. I cry watching movies so much that my kids will recognize a sad part, and start watching me for tears. And not just at sad things. I cry during the "touching" scenes where everyone is happy, but emotional.

Knowing how easy it is for me to cry, crying at her funeral would only be ordinary. I wanted to show my children that the Bible is true when it says that we don't sorrow as others.

1 Thessalonians 4:13 But I would not have you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning them which are asleep, that ye sorrow not, even as others which have no hope.

I purposed in my heart that I would be strong. The way I saw it, if I really believed she was with Jesus, then why would I cry? I shed very few tears that day. When my brother preached the ceremony, I got to smile a lot, remembering the strong lady I called Mawmaw.

But I finally succumbed to tears. Not later that day. Not later that week. But just a few months ago. (you can laugh at me, here) We were watching "Driving Miss Daisy" when one of the kids remarked how, at the end in the nursing home scene, she looked like Mawmaw. It didn't hit me right away, but as the scene progressed, and the Alzheimer's was more evident, I started missing my Mawmaw. I broke down, right in front of my wife and children.

Did I ruin what I had established at the funeral? I don't think so. Read the verse again. It doesn't say we are simply to have no sorrow. It says we do not sorrow as those with no hope. You see, there were those at the funeral with no hope. There were many there who will never see Mawmaw again, unless they get saved. They should be sobbing. Their feet are walking in sulfur. They are headed to a Hell beyond their own comprehension. They sorrow because even if they have a head knowledge of God, they don't have that indwelling Spirit to soothe their crying. They don't really know what to believe, and what not to believe.

I wasn't crying for my Mawmaw. I was just missing her. I think that's OK.

So, on 9/11/2010, Mawmaw's first birthday with Jesus, I spent the day driving, listening to news about 9/11, and replays of broadcasts from that day. I was worked up a little at how soon after 9/11 America gave up on the brotherhood we learned on that day. I heard relatives read the name of their loved ones who died on that day. And amongst all the ceremony and remembrances, I just simply spent the day missing my Mawmaw.

9/11/2001 changed our world. 9/11/2010 changed 9/11 for me, forever.

Mawmaw, you meant the world to me. I am the man I am today due to your Godly influence. I know where you are, and I know I will see you again. But I do miss you.

She was singing Amazing Grace

No sermon here. Just a few thoughts about my Mawmaw and her birthday.

It Is Your Life

Deuteronomy 32:46,47
(Moses speaking to the children of Israel)
And he said unto them, Set your hearts unto all the words which I testify among you this day, which ye shall command your children to observe to do, all the words of this law. For it is not a vain thing for you; BECAUSE IT IS YOUR LIFE: and through this thing ye shall prolong your days in the land, whither ye go over Jordan to possess it. (emphasis added)

We often hear that by obeying your parents, you add to your years. The Bible is very clear that this is true.
But here, we see that by commanding our children to walk in God's will, we also prolong our lives. Perhaps this is why He calls them our LIFE.
The first time I remember hearing my Pastor use this passage, the words "it is your life" jumped out at me and left a huge lump in my throat.
The very reason for my existence, at this moment, is to see that my children are cared for. My wife is my partner in this. We want what is best for our children. Not what is most desired by them, but what God knows is BEST for them.

Tiger Woods came on the scene not too many years ago. We all watched the pride in his father's eyes as he climbed the ranks doing what earlier society would not allow his father to do.
I can only imagine what his first green jacket meant to his father.
I used to be jealous of Tiger, because his Dad got to see him succeed. I wished mine could see some of my comparitively minor accomplishments. I wish he could see his grandkids, and my beautiful wife.
We watched Tiger cry when his father died and slipped off into eternity. I empathized with Tiger that day. Though I am not a golf fan, I became a Tiger fan. I feel he loved his Daddy just as much as I loved mine.
I was pleased to hear stories about his marriage to a beautiful woman, and later, the birth of his kids. I imagined him one day teaching his own son the game that brought his father so much joy.

Then came the wreck. Rumors started immediately. Women from all over the circuit came forward as his girlfriends. The media was abuzz. We watched him go to ridiculous clinics to be treated for equally ridiculous ailments.

Now they are divorced.
Now a mother is without her life partner.
Now children are without their father.
Now a father is without... His life.

If only we had a rewind button.

Again, I can empathize with Tiger. But with a twist, this time. You see part of my life is now separated from me because someone else became a greater influence in his life than I was.
I can reason some things away. I know we all have free will. But when I know my son spent a period sleeping in his truck; when I see him continually make choices that keep hurting him; when I lay in bed and wonder where he is, no amount of reasoning soothes my heart.

He is my life.

I do not even know all the mistakes I might have made. I don't know what to do different with my three remaining children. But I know that part of my life is missing.

God has shown me unbelievable grace in the past year since Ryan left home. He has brought me closer to my wife. He has taught me to cherish every moment with her. He has shown me how she enjoys just being with me, whether it be over coffee, or on a date.
God has taught me to cherish my children. He has shown me what is really important in their lives, and what is not needed. He has shown me how much they love seeing me act silly, just to see them smile and hear them laugh. Everyday I discover something new that I love about them. He has even given me opportunity to not be fearless, but show my youngest son how to face those fears and never back down.

I cannot say that I will not fail my children, again. But I am a changed man.

I pray as oft as I can for my son, Ryan. I pray for his safety. I pray for his health. I pray that he knows I still love him.
But most of all, I pray that God helps me to walk as I should, so that one day MY LIFE will come back to God.

He is a Soldier

We awaken to music and push the snooze for nine more minutes of rest,

…He awakens to sounds of heavy trucks moving nearby

He is a Soldier

We roll out of bed and head for the shower,

…He hasn’t showered in days

He is a Soldier

We spend ten minutes picking out the right tie,

…He only wishes he had some clean socks

He is a Soldier

We walk into the kitchen where we first see our wife today,

…He sees his loved ones only in his memory

He is a Soldier

We enjoy the toast and eggs as we sip our first cup of java,

…He stands in line for powdered eggs and wishes his coffee tasted like coffee

He is a Soldier

We complain about traffic on our daily commute,

...He will walk every where he goes today

He is a Soldier

We spend all day wondering if our co-worker will get the promotion we deserve,

…He wonders which of his buddies will die today

He is a Soldier

We rush down to the café griping about how short an hour lunch can seem,

…He waits in line again just to get a bowl of indistinguishable soup

He is a Soldier

We spend all afternoon plotting the best way to avoid traffic on our way home,

…He wonders what locale he will call home for the night

He is a Soldier

We look down our nose at the vagrant digging through trash wearing an old Army jacket,

…He is only looking for something to eat or wrap up in for the cold night ahead

He is THAT Soldier

I heard a while back that tens of thousands of veterans are homeless. Not that I hadn’t heard this before, but with Veteran’s Day coming (at the time) it hit home. My heart sank as I pondered a nation with such blessings allowing their heroes to sleep under bridges. These men served just as valiant as any other soldier, sailor, or marine. They left home and family to stand in the gap for our families. Some fought wars, some just stood in service. All deserve our respect.

I settled this a while back. I refuse to be modest about my military service because I feel it devalues what others like me have done. I left the Army Reserve for Regular Army in 1991. I signed my enlistment with the reports of the latest bombing runs in Iraq playing in the background. The LT thought that would make the enlistment more significant. Moments later I raised my hand and swore an oath to our nation. My graduating class at MP school was the first in almost a year not to go directly to Saudi Arabia.

When I left the service in 1994, family helped me get back on my feet. I lived with an aunt, then my brother till I was able to save enough money for an apartment. I worked three jobs at times and after realizing I wasn’t getting back into Law Enforcement, went to truckdriving school in 1996. Without the help of my family, I could have also ended up homeless.

It pains me to know that some of my Brothers in Arms are curling up with a bottle of cheap liquor under the Parkway as I type this very message. The reasons they are there vary. Some might even deserve to be there.

I’ve heard all the stories about those who have unsuccessfully tried to help Huntsville’s homeless.
It is easy to turn our backs on them and judge them as wanting to be there, but does compassion judge?

1 Corinthians 13:4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind…

I’m not announcing a new program, or surrendering to new work dealing with the homeless Vets. I’m just being the town crier. It’s 11pm and all is not well in our country.

What can we do? If you know of a way to help them, do so. Write your congressmen. We find it easy to write them when they want to raise our taxes. This is much more important than money.
They stood for us. Now, it’s our turn.
Pray that our nation begins showing more honor to its veterans.